I walk into my exhibition in Edinburgh and I become aware that I am naked from the waist down. However, this does not seem to faze me in the slightest and no one seems to notice. I had heard that two reporters were visiting my exhibition and would later write a review in a newspaper. I quickly scan the room and catch sight of them in the distance holding a white clipboard and taking notes.  I overhear one of them state to the other: “This is most definitely my favourite one.” When they leave the area I curiously and briskly walk over to find out which one of my photographs they were discussing.  However, to my dismay all of my photographs have been replaced by paintings of an artist that I do not know.  The painting they were discussing was in fact an Abstract oil which looked remarkably similar to Jackson Pollock’s ‘Naked Man with Knife’ (although slightly distorted and more intense with fiery reds). Beside the Pollock was a black painting featuring a figure holding a rainbow in its hand.

My attention was drawn to a glass cabinet against the far wall. I walk over to it and to my disgust I see one of my photographs (‘Staring at the TV’) in the cabinet behind three gold candles and various other remnants. I am in a state of panic and I walk up to the front desk and demand to know why my exhibition has been replaced. The woman at the desk seems genuinely unaware of what has happened and agrees to help me put all my photographs back up on the walls.

Starting with the Jackson Pollock copy I take down around three or four of the paintings before I realise who they belong to. The paintings actually belong to an evil artist who is intent on taking over the world with his art (a character based upon Sutter Cane from the film ‘In the Mouth of Madness’). However, the artist does not paint himself but uses his magical powers to obtain the paintings from his fanatical fans. He then passes them off as his own. I now find myself outside on the street.

I observe as the evil artist levitates over the houses firing lasers from his hands. I run back inside to escape him where a policeman looks directly at me and says: “Stand still, you will be safe if you stand still.” However, no matter how hard I try I cannot stand still and the evil artist appears in front of me. He is grotesque and hunched over (not dissimilar to a character from the film ‘Conan the Barbarian’ which I had watched before retiring to bed). Although he only has two arms, he moves them quickly and it seems he has more. He walks toward me grabbing everyone in his path with his whirlwind arms and placing them into his hunch. As he gets near me his arms become entangled with a rope that is tied to my legs. I appear to have him trapped. I drag him along the carpet and as I near the exit I somehow manage to trick him into falling down a lift shaft. I walk out of the door where I am greeted by a woman and a black child standing in front of a green car. The woman hands me the keys as she is unable to drive. I have somehow managed to rescue one of my photographs (‘Café on the outskirts of town’). I attach it to the underneath of the car with the rope that is still around my legs and drive away.